Gosh, we women can never stop talking about these 3Ls. We would discuss, contemplate, complain, praise, wonder, cry and laugh about it all the time. We’d have hours of conversations over dinner and even after three chocolate martinis later, we still have no clue on how to deal with love, life and lust. Do we actually learn somthing from these endless discussions?
I learn the hard way.
I learn that if I want to experience love, I need to be the first one to show love and compassion to others – not just one or two people that I like or find interesting, but to every single being I encounter. Love attracts love! How hard is it to just be kind and smile to people? To look at another being in the eyes and show your respect and care?
Then, if I want to experience life to its fullest, I need to first show curiosity, interest and gratitude for life itself. What new things do I learn this week? What kinds of things I’m grateful for today? What do I want to discover this week? What can I contribute in my community? These are the questions that I need to live by and take action for my life to be fascinating and full.
Or, do I just want to experience pure and utter lust? An ego based action that will give me pure instant gratification with no care in the world. No care, no love.
So, sip your drink and look at the quality of your life this moment. Have you truly loved? Have you really lived? Have you lusted? What are your choices for the future? Trust me ladies, show, give and share more and you shall receive more! Go create miracles!
Just for today…
Think about how you love, how you live and how you embrace lust now and then. Have you really been honest?
*wrote this a long time ago for a magazine, just found it again, a good reminder for me
With a new spread of anti-aging creams, wellness centres, gyms, health stores and beauty salons in Jakarta, one must wonder if Indonesian women have cared more about their health and beauty or just in a new pursuit of achieving perfection. Has a quest for beauty become the new trend?
With all of those facilities available, one would think that Indonesian women are happier and more balanced. However, I notice that we have become especially pressured to look younger, have better skin, have a toner body and lose more pounds. Has it become a chore to be beautiful?
I found the secret to be younger, healthier, more beautiful and definitely happier as I age (ask my girls who think I am so strange :p). How? I realized sometime ago that I am already perfect – as a being of God – as perfectly summed by Tao The Ching:
“The greatest perfection seems imperfect, and yet its use is inexhaustible.”
I learn to give myself permission to be perfect, even with al of my seeming imperfections.
Does this mean that I stop exercising, eating healthy, taking supplements and using night cream? On no ladies, it only means that:
I am thankful for all my “seeming” imperfections (i.e. my big butt :p)
I do everything for a different reason. Before, to make myself look better in some distant future. Now, I do it just for the sake of doing it, because it makes me feel good, strong, energized and alive at that moment.
I have fun!
Just for today…
Today, choose to do one activity that will make you feel good about yourself. It could be eating more veggies, walk for 10 minutes or skip a caffeine drink. Then, make a conscious choice to do this every day. Feel beautiful, then you shall radiate beauty!
There are times and days where we feel lost and weak. I remember telling my girl Mira last year that at those times, when I need to be lifted, empowered and reminded, this is the song I listen and sing to. My prayer to you reading this, may grace always follow you.
The Prayer
I pray you’ll be our eyes, and watch us where we go. And help us to be wise in times when we don’t know
Let this be our prayer, when we lose our way
Lead us to a place, guide us with your grace
To a place where we’ll be safe
La luce che tu hai I pray we’ll find your light
Nel cuore restera And hold it in our hearts.
A ricordaci che
When stars go out each night,
L’eterna stella sei
The light you have
I pray well find your light
Will be in the heart
And hold it in our hearts.
To remember us that When stars go out each night,
You are eternal star nella mia preghiera
Let this be our prayer
Quanta fede che
When shadows fill our day
How much faith there’s
Let this be our prayer
In my prayer When shadows fill our day lead us to a place, guide us with your grace
Give us faith so well be safe sognamo un mondo senza pi violenza
Un mondo di giustizia e di speranza
Ognuno dia la mano al suo vicino
Simbolo di pace, di fratern
We dream a world without violence
A world of justice and faith.
Everyone gives the hand to his neighbours
Symbol of peace, of fraternity la forza che ci
We ask that life be kind
Il desiderio che
And watch us from above
Ognuno trovi amor
We hope each soul will find
Intorno e dentro
Another soul to love
The force his gives us We ask that life be kind
Is wish that And watch us from above
Everyone finds love We hope each soul will find
Around and inside
Another soul to love let this be our prayer
Let this be our prayer, just like every child need to find a place, guide us with your grace
Give us faith so well be safe
Need to find a place, guide us with your grace
Give us faith so well be safe la fede che
Hai acceso in noi,
Sento che ci salv It’s the faith
You light in us
I feel it will save us
Saya mau punya apartemen sendiri tahun ini. Saya mau meningkatkan karir saya. Saya mau trekking ke Kathmandu. Saya mau turun 10 kg. Saya mau bertemu my prince charming. Saya mau kembali sekolah lagi. Saya mau bahagia. Ini adalah berbagai hal yang orang inginkan setiap harinya…
Setiap tahun, kita pasti memiliki keinginan. Dan yang namanya manusia, setiap tahun keinginan itupun semakin banyak (Banyak Maunya – BM). Saya rasa, tidak ada yang salah memiliki banyak keinginan, tujuan maupun target. Itu semua yang memicu kita untuk membentuk kehidupan yang lebih baik bukan? Pertanyaannya: Bisakah kita mendapatkan semua yang kita inginkan?
“You will get everything you want when you BECOME everything you want.“
Then, saya menemukan kutipan ini: “Kamu baru akan mendapatkan semua yang kamu inginkan, ketika kamu menjadi orang yang kamu inginkan.”
Jujur, rasanya seperti agak ditampar sedikit dengan sebuah ciuman manis. It’s so true!
Selama ini rasanya saya pun lebih banyak fokus ke hal-hal yang saya ingikan dibandingkan diri saya sendiri. Memang saya tahu apa kekuatan dan kelemahan diri saya, tetapi memang jarang saya menanyakan ke diri saya sendiri, “Saya ingin menjadi orang seperti apa?” – nilai-nilai seperti apa yang saya ingin miliki dalam karakter dan kepribadian saya? Wow!
It’s not about what you do, but about who you are. Because who you are will be reflected in everything that you do.
Saya realize, semua bukan tentang hal-hal yang saya lakukan tetapi tentang siapa saya, karena siapa saya akan tercermin dalam setiap hal yang saya lakukan.
Saya terinspirasi untuk sekali lagi fokus ke diri saya terlebih dahulu, dibandingkan ke hal-hal duniawi lain yang saya inginkan. Saya ingin menjadi diri saya yang terbaik (the best version of me), seseorang yang benar-benar hidup berdasarkan nilai-nilai, seseorang yang walk the talk. If I learn anything this year, this is the year to walk to talk.
So, who am I? Siapa saya?
Saya lalu merumuskan nilai-nilai yang saya anggap sangat penting bagi diri saya dan menuliskannya dalam sebuah surat untuk diri saya sendiri. Kamu bisa membacanya di sini. Dan setiap kali saya membaca surat ini, sekali lagi saya terinspirasi dan termotivasi untuk terus menjadi diri saya yang terbaik. This is me! This is who I want to become.
This is what I want for 2010. Di tahun 2010 ini, walaupun sudah jalan 5 bulan, saya ingin menjadi diri saya yang terbaik. This is the year to focus on ME! Karena saya tahu, kalau saya bisa menjadi diri saya yang terbaik, saya pun akan mendapatkan semua yang saya inginkan dalam hidup
How? One day at a time. One value at a time.
Kalau kata teman saya, “I think I can. I believe I can. I know I can. I can. I am.” Kalau saya bisa melangkah 1 langkah saja setiap harinya, di akhir tahun ini saya sudah menjadi orang yang jauh lebih baik dari saya hari ini. Tetapi, let’s not get ahead of ourselves. Saya mulai dengan hari ini. Hari ini, saya sudah satu langkah lebih maju.
Now, my friends, kamu sudah tahu kamu ingin jadi orang seperti apa? Let’s suit up! Tell me who YOU want to become…
Jika kamu tinggal di Jakarta, kamu pasti tahu bahwa Jakarta bukan tempat yang mudah untuk mendapatkan cinta. Bukan cinta semalam, bukan cinta segitiga ataupun cinta semata. Tetapi true love. Cinta dengan suatu kualitas yang dicari setiap orang, terlebih kalau kamu termasuk the single 30-somethings.
Pembicaraan sepulang kerja, dipojokan bar favorit diantara empat wanita pun, yang dimulai dari pekerjaan dan keluarga akhirnya mengerucut menjadi tentang cinta. Sambil meneguk minuman favorit masing-masing, bergantian kita bercerita. Satu baru mulai jatuh cinta. Satu baru saja kembali patah hati. Satu bingung mau dibawa kemana cinta-nya. Dan, yang satu, baru saja punya crush dengan seseorang yang baru dikenal. Diskusi malam itu menjadi “so, what would love do?” – apa yang cinta akan lakukan? Love will bring out your best self.
“Soul-mates are people who bring out the best in you. They are not perfect but are always perfect for you.” ~Unknown
Yang sedang jatuh cinta glows - dia bersinar. Ia pun tidak ingat kapan terakhir Ia bersinar. Semua yang melihatnya pun mengakuinya. It is very electric. Lucunya, cinta telah membuat dia jatuh cinta kepada dirinya terlebih dahulu: Ia lebih rajin pergi ke gym, Ia makan lebih sehat, ia lebih terbuka kepada orang lain, Ia pun lebih pe-de. Selanjutnya, she is in so much joy, sehingga “keberuntungan” pun mulai mendatangi dirinya. Berbagai job offers baru pun Ia dapatkan. Ia banyak bertemu orang-orang baru yang mengagumkan. Ia pun menjadi lebih berani dalam mengambil resiko. Wow! Dia mengatakan, “yang terbaik adalah, dengan dia.. I can be myself.” Cinta membuat dirinya nyaman dengan dirinya sendiri. Cinta membuat dia nyaman mencoba hal-hal baru, seperti rasa takut itu tidak ada. Memang, tidak ada hal yang pasti, tetapi cinta membuat dia merasa nyaman, berani dan hidup – cinta telah menjadikannya a better version of herself.That’s when you know… » Read the rest of this entry «
I learn the hard way.
I found the secret to be younger, healthier, more beautiful and definitely happier as I age (ask my girls who think I am so strange :p). How? I realized sometime ago that I am already perfect – as a being of God – as perfectly summed by Tao The Ching:
Then, saya menemukan kutipan ini: “Kamu baru akan mendapatkan semua yang kamu inginkan, ketika kamu menjadi orang yang kamu inginkan.”